I haven’t had much of a chance to get on here – probably won’t for a while for we currently have visitors – but I’m trying to write a little bit whenever I can.
So without further ado, The Book of Awesome – approximately half way through…
(84) Talking about how much the meal you’re eating at home would cost in a restaurant (pg 155)
You know what costs a ton at restaurants? Salads. That seems so ridiculous when you consider what’s actually in them, so whenever I make a salad at home, I’ve been known to yell, “HA! Take that Milestones, I could charge $15 for this too!”
Sometimes, though, it’s all about the convenience, and I am way more about the convenience than the art of putting food together. So, sure, eggs, potatoes and sausage aren’t that expensive, but I’d much rather just pay the $10-$15 at a restaurant and have them make brunch food for me…
Still, look at my dang good salad!
(85) When you arrive at your destination just as a great song ends on the radio (pg 156)
Remember that radio station I mentioned a while back? The one that plays the BEST songs. Well, thanks to that, this happens to me often these days.
Here are a selection of songs that make me hope I’ll reach my destination just as the song is ending so I can hear it all the way through…
There are probably many, many more but these are the ones I thought of off the top of my head/that I have actually had this happen with most recently.
(86) Saying the same thing a sport commentator says just before they say it (pg 157)
Though I was raised on watching hockey and tennis, I can’t claim to be a sports aficionado. I still haven’t quite caught on to basketball (the fouls just confuse the hell out of me). I’ve been to two baseball games thanks to school raffle prizes and hated it. I don’t get football either with all it’s stopping every two seconds (but rugby – that I can enjoy).
So because of that, I haven’t had this experience, but I do know someone who is exactly like this – my mom!
I have actually said to my mom in the past that she should be a sports commentator because somehow, she’s always on it with EVERY sport. She and my dad can get into anything – even the sports I don’t understand. Every year when the Superbowl comes, it takes them about five minutes to recall the rules, but they seem to totally get it once they do.
The best, though, is with basketball, when she starts naming off players like she’s known them her whole life and what they ought to be doing (note: she doesn’t watch basketball regularly, this is just some sort of magical, natural gift that she seems to pick up when she does watch it.)
As for me, I just sit there yelling “WHY was that little bit of nothing a foul and the other guy getting elbowed right in his FACE wasn’t?! I DON’T GET IT!”
From #86, it’s pretty obvious that aside from watching hockey and tennis, I am not a sporty person. I have never been a sporty person. Gym was, and remains, my least favourite of all subjects, so this whole “orange slices at halftime” situation, made no sense to me.
I think it was in Avengers, maybe, where Tony Stark makes a comment about needing some orange slices. I didn’t get it. That joke was totally lost on me.
It was only when I was watching the first season of (that fantastic show!) Orphan Black , that I found out this was a thing. Alison, the homemaker/soccer mom character, was cutting up oranges during her children’s soccer game and I thought “Is this a thing??” and sure enough, I found out, it is! Somehow, oranges are the best mid-game snack.
From what I just read on this website, “Oranges are loaded with vitamin C, which helps to boost energy.”
Side note – Neil Pasricha really loves his oranges, doesn’t he? 😛 First the, “Peeling the oranges in one shot” entry, now this one. If not for my allergies, oranges wouldn’t rank that high up for me.
(89) Putting potato chips on a sandwich (pg 161)
Ahhh the ol’ potato chips on a sandwich. Before I actually get into this, let me just say that I am a bit disappointed to hear that Subway (at least in Canada), is currently without Cold Cuts.
My sister just came and told me this, as we were meant to have it for lunch, and I thought she was joking because, Subway – Cold Cuts = nonsense.
And yet, their twitter confirmed it!
Kind of suspicious if you ask me… Reminds me of that time on King of the Hill when Alamo Beer was suddenly unavailable. But hey, if it’s just the same as that, and is making people “vomitando” then I don’t mind it’s not being around for a while… 😛
Back to the subject at hand, though, putting chips in sandwiches is a wonderful thing to do and I first learned of this idea from a man that…these days you don’t want to really be connected with – Bill Cosby.
There was an episode of The Cosby Show where Cosby is showing his son Theo (Malcolm Jamal-Warner) how to make the ultimate sandwhich by putting chips in it. This was a truly brilliant idea.
Of course, back in the 90s, The Cosby Show was about as wholesome as you could get and Cosby was the ultimate in awesome dads. These days… Let’s just move on, shall we? 😛 (Still, chips in sandwiches, can’t go wrong with that!)
I’ll leave you all there for now. Have yourselves a good weekend!
Been a busy few days, to the point where I can’t even remember when I last posted anything…
Firstly, a Happy Rakhdi/Rakhi/Rakhri/Raksha Bandhan – whatever you may call it… to all the sisters and brothers out there.
To the brothers, sorry for the lightening of your wallets, to the sisters…
Enjoy your newfound given wealth!
For anyone not in the know, here’s a little description of this holiday, c/o wikipedia:
The festival celebrates the love and duty between brothers and sisters. It is also popularly used to celebrate any brother-sister type of relationship between men and women who may or may not be biologically related. On Raksha Bandhan, a sister ties a rakhi (sacred thread) on her brother’s wrist with a prayer for his prosperity and happiness. This symbolizes the sister’s love. The brother gives her a token gift and a promise to protect her.
TL;DR – Sister’s tie a thread on brothers, brothers fork over money. Sisters celebrate. 😛
And now, back to your regularly scheduled program…
(78) Frozen walls of air conditioning hitting you on hot days (pg 144)
There was one summer, when I was about 18 or 19 when our air conditioner decided that this was a good time to just stop working.
I had never been SO HAPPY to go to work, so that I could escape to the refuge that was the nice, cool AC of my good ol’ shoe store.
Nowadays, we have a working air conditioner, but also have older parents, who think it’s totally fine to not have the AC on when it feels like 37 degrees because the wind from outside will come in (it will not) and circulate around the house (it does not).
Even after the discussions on how air doesn’t seem to come into our house that much, likely because of how it’s placed/the direction it’s facing, I will still get texts from my sister while at work, warning me that the house is an NO-AC-ZONE, at the moment. 😐
For more on parents and Air Conditioning, please refer to this scene from one of the best TV shows of all-time (I’m sure some of you know exactly which scene I am referring to!), which totally and fully encapsulates this experience.
(79) Catching somebody singing in their car and sharing a laugh with them (pg 145)
There is a radio station that just started here a few month ago, but quickly became my favourite because they play a lot of “way-backs” – which I am sad and frightened to report, means songs from the late 90s and early 2000s now! :O
They do play songs back to the 80s too, but having been born in the 80s, that makes me sad too because that constitutes me as an “oldie”…
That pain aside, this station is the best because I get an abundance of the songs I grew up with – BSB, Britney, Spice Girls, *NSYNC, Missy, Eminem, Destiny’s Child, etc. etc.
If a Backstreet Boys song is on… I will be singing along to it. That’s just how it goes.
If it happens to be my (previously mentioned) favourite song, The One – which doesn’t tend to come on the radio much, but I sometimes play myself, especially on rough days to cheer me up – I will be VERY enthusiastically singing along.
Thanks to this radio station, it’s not uncommon to come across people at the stoplight next to you doing just the same.
They’ll also be singing and dancing up a storm to great songs and just by how they are bobbing and grooving, you know they’re on the same song as you.
Most popular artist who elicits this response from everyone (aside from BSB)?
I have been known to complain a lot about my dislike of snow and winter, but, truth be told, I dislike having to go out in winter. (I’d be a highly successful bear, should any of them ever want to recruit me into their bear-crews.)
When you don’t have to go anywhere, snow can be very pretty and relaxing to watch, and seeing a new, fresh sheet of snow just adds to that. At one of my jobs, I used to take people out snowshoeing and though it was always sad to see the fresh snow get trampled, snowshoes are actually REALLY COOL!
I rewrote the snowshoe program at my work and because of that, learned a lot about them, so are you ready for some Useless Snowshoe Trivia?!
Snowshoes were found that date back to over 5000 years!
Because the traditional (i.e. stereotypical) snowshoes look like tennis racquets, French-Canadian settlers actually referred to them as “raquettes” – a name that has stuck (google: “French word for snowshoe” and you’ll see!)
When putting on snowshoes, you go by your weightnot your shoe size – this has made my trying to help people select them a bit awkward, because you never want to ask someone their weight. To skirt around that fact, we had a chart that we could refer them to, so that they could select it themselves. I was on the cusp of a Medium-Large and Large size of snowshoe and found it wasn’t working with the L; when I changed to the M/L, it actually did work
THEY REALLY DO WORK! It has to do with surface area and weight distribution. At first it might seem like they’re not doing anything, but take one off and you’ll see how far in you actually sink
You need a certain type of snow FOR it to work though – if it’s icy snow, it’s not going to be that great
Modern snowshoes don’t look like what you’d expect, You probably imagine the old-fashioned stereotypical ones, modern ones look more like this (image from Wikipedia “Snowshoe”page):
And now that you’ve learned all this about snowshoes, go back to enjoying the summer because, thankfully, it’s not winter…yet.
(81) Taking off your shoes on a long car ride (pg 148)
Smelly feet shouldn’t be shared with the whole world, just my opinion, but, truly, that is how I feel.
That being said, I am also a driver now so I really don’t think this is the safest thing to do while driving! (Of course, he meant as a passenger, but as I said about – keep your smelly feet to yourself please!)
(82) Getting the eyelash out of your eye (pg 150)
Ready for a minor horror story?
About a month ago, I went to a party and when I came home had the arduous task of taking off my makeup ahead of me.
I love putting on makeup, even though I cannot claim to be any good at it – especially not since all these YouTube videos of girls with their makeup abilities started popping up.
When I do my makeup I feel like Marge when she’s been shot by Homer’s makeup gun (see the image).
But I digress…
For whatever reason, when taking my makeup off, I didn’t take my contacts out. I think I had logically told myself I didn’t need to anyway because they’d get cleaned by the hydrogen peroxide solution I leave them in overnight and also if I keep them on I can actually see and make sure I got all the above, clown-faced, gunk off my face.
Usually this isn’t a problem, but on this day, I was a bit more aggressively trying to get my mascara off and… (I think you might see where this is going…) my contact lens suddenly disappeared.
I looked everywhere – the counter, the floor, the door – just in case. My sister walked by and saw me standing there with blank confusion, so even she helped me look. Then I said the dreaded thing, “I’m wondering if it’s still in my eye and I couldn’t feel it.”
She checked, both of us a bit freaked out, but my sister even more than me because she’s very grossed out by eye things and I’ve been sticking contacts in mine for 15+ years. Lo and behold, no contact!
So I breathed a sigh of relief and assumed we must’ve just missed it on the floor, possibly on the bath mat. It’s happened before, it was fine. I’d just switch to my new pack.
Cut to 5 or so hours later…
I’d been sleeping just fine, but my eye was suddenly SO itchy. I, forgetting what had transpired the previous night, as I was half-asleep at this point – put a ton of eyedrops in and went back to sleep.
Once I’d gotten my full 8 hours (and then some) of sleep, I trundled over to my washroom and realized… my eye was still hurting. Poking I’d say. Not so much itchy, but definitely felt like there was something in there.
Then it hit me.
THE CONTACT LENS.
I, cautiously, pulled up my lid and… what did I see there? A teeny, tinny curve of my contact lens, on the top of my eyeball.
I’ll save you the more descriptive details, but needless to say more – it was, indeed, stuck to the top of my eyeball and with the help of eyedrops, I managed to coax it back down.
I slept for 8+ hours with my contact stuck up in my eye! By now, I’m sure lots of you have seen this INSANE story about a woman losing TWENTY-SEVEN contact lenses in her right eye. I have NO clue how she didn’t manage to feel them in there. Even with just the one lost in my eye I was so worried and I could feel the pain and poking.
The strange thing about my variety of contact lenses is that you are actually able to sleep in them. I have attempted this once before, just to see, even though I was very much against the idea of doing so because it seemed extremely unsafe – even with the doctor’s permission.
One of them ended up way too pasted to my eye and felt very uncomfortable. The other, somehow, ended up on the floor…
Point being, clearly they shift and feel odd in some way, so:
HOW DO YOU END UP WITH 27 CONTACT LENSES IN YOUR EYE?!
(83) Finally figuring out how your hotel shower faucet works (pg 153)
My niece was sitting here while I was about to start this one and noticed my jot notes for this topic, which said: “My fear of water and hotel shower faucets.”
To which she said, “You’re afraid of water and hotel shower faucets??” And then proceeded to slowly slink away from me because she thinks I’m so weird. 😛
But yes, yes I am.
I wouldn’t say I am afraid of hotel shower faucets NOW, not as much at least, but they still do irk me. Not all of them, but those types you have to turn ALL the way to high pressure to get hot water… those ones.
Let me back track:
When I was about three years old, I was traumatized in many ways. (1) I got caught in a storm and now fear tornadoes (2) I was taken to Niagara Falls and now fear waterfalls.
Over time, I’ve gotten better about both, but I was so afraid of rushing water as a kid that I didn’t even like to play in waterparks and water play areas and, yes, I didn’t like faucets when turned to their highest pressure.
THUS, my dislike of hotel faucets. For the most part, when you’re going to turn a shower faucet to the hottest (which is my preferred shower-water), you have to turn it all the way until it’s gushing out.
I can’t stand the sound of rushing water, which I do believe came from Niagara Falls (any waterfalls, really, but Niagara is the closest to us and so we’ve been there often.) As far as I know, I’ve only seen two other waterfalls in my life and was not pleased at seeing either – one was in Ottawa, and the other was in New Brunswick. I may go to Hamilton, Ontario soon enough and see some there, but I’ve heard those are smaller, so they might not bother me as much.
So there you have it, I have a unique phobia. I have yet to actually find a proper name for it because “fear of waterfalls” doesn’t seem to be a real thing because 99.9% of people seem to LOVE waterfalls. People go stand next to the dang things and go behind them in Niagara, meanwhile, my just writing about this gives me this really weird, hair-standing-up-on-the-back-of-my-neck feeling and shakiness deep down…
I don’t have a fear of rivers or lakes, I think those are pretty nice, but I suppose “flowing water” works (rushing water seems more accurate). And this waterfall-phobia really does seem to be a true phobia for me because despite the fact that I have forced myself to look at them and go fairly near (railings), just thinking about it now, like I said, is freaking me out and when searching the fear name I was REALLY hoping no photos came up because I didn’t want to look at any.
Lucky for me, in recent years, Niagara Falls has created a wonderful casino and tourist area away from the Falls themselves, so I’ve had trips there where I haven’t had to look at them at all! So, thanks for that Fallsview! (Despite the name, it’s actually far enough away that you can’t see them from the ground level all that easily.)
And that’s where I’ll leave it today. This has been a post a few days in the making, so I shall post it now while I have the chance! Until next time…
I started writing this post two days ago, and then got side-tracked by work and such, so here’s what I started out with, even though it’s now 2 days off:
I just got my allergy shot earlier and my arm hurts WAY more than usual. My doctor is away until next week and the other doctor who gave it to me joked that he’s not as good as mine because it hurts when he gives shots – BOY was he right!!
But enough of that, on to the awesome things of The Book of Awesome…
(73) Sneaking under someone else’s umbrella (pg 136)
By now, you all know of my height.
So… guess who’s always left holding the umbrella? 😐
I suppose it also doesn’t help that I hate getting rain-hair or rain on my glasses (when I wear them), so I am always umbrella-prepared.
Just this week, four of us went out for a lunch. There have been thunderstorm warnings all week and the sky was quite overcast and ominous.
How many of us had umbrellas?
That’s right just me. 😐
I do think it’s better to be safe than sorry, especially when you hate being rained on!
From what I’ve heard from family and friends, though, not everyone hates being rained on as much as I do. (In fact, my dad purposefully, goes out when it’s pouring rain because he loves it so much!)
(74) Finally remembering a word that’s been on the tip of your tongue for so long (pg 137)
The older I get, the more foggy my brain gets, so this is a usual occurrence in my life.
Trying to write this blog is hard enough, but when you actually have to make conversation and your brain just doesn’t want to work, that’s the worst!
(75) When someone offers to toss your dirty clothes in with their load (pg 138)
I am the opposite of Neil Pasricha here. I saw this same episode of Family Feud where they asked for a chore you don’t mind doing and my first choice was, indeed, laundry.
I don’t mind putting the laundry into wash and dry – a bit more of a hassle when you have to hang it up, but put on some good tunes and dance away (and up those pedometer steps) and its not that bad. I do hate folding and putting them away after the fact, though.
So needing to toss my clothes in with other peo ple has never been a big thing for me. Also, I constantly worry that something I’d give to someone else (i.e. mom, sister) to put with their load will bleed and ruin all their stuff! And because of that, I never do share any of my laundry.
Oh man, this just reminded me that I still have clothes sitting in the dry to put away…Eep!
(76) The moment at a restaurant after you see your food coming from the kitchen but before it lands on your table (pg 140)
Ain’t this the truth.
Being “healthy” with salad :p
That exciting moment when you spot your food, but then you worry, “Maybe that’s not my food and just someone else’s that ordered the same thing…”
But it is!
He says here that as it’s approaching, “conversation hushes” and that’s so true too. I find the second the food comes ALL conversation ceases, as we all devour our food as if we haven’t eaten for days.
Conversation can always happen, eating your nice, warm food is only able to happen for a short time…
(77) Terrible businesses run by children (pg 141)
I was blown away when Mr Pasricha mentioned Junior Achievementin this section because in Grade 8 or so, we all had a presentation by them too! All I remember about it is that they had us putting together yellow ballpoint pens to learn about how to run a business…?
To be honest, I learned nothing about running my own business, but I did get a snazzy yellow pen out of it to use for all my artistic endeavors.
Now, 18 years later, I have a preteen niece, who has all of my creativity with all of the business acumen that these J.A. presenters were targeting with their workshops.
He says “terrible businesses” because they don’t tend to do so well with their sales, which is true because it’s very hard to market products as a child. Even still, my niece is putting her heart and soul into her businesses and is taking them very seriously. She started with paper origami bookmarks, from there, she has now moved to jewelry and card-making.
And let me tell you, SHE’S GOOD! (And I’m not just saying this because I am a proud aunty, though I am.)
I would post you all some photos of her wares, but will need to get her to OK that. She’s made us all her marketing team, but I actually got kicked off of the marketing team for doing a bad job of selling products to my friends… :p I think I was demoted to “helper.”
Unfortunately, even if I post her great products, I have no way to get them to all of you (unless you know me personally), so you can just enjoy the pretty pictures if/when I do post them.
My posts may be a little more sporadic for the next little bit, as I might be busy for the next couple weeks and I haven’t been feeling 100%. BUT I will do my best to keep it up, since I did start this because I wanted to keep honing and brushing up on my writing skills again.
So with that in mind, let’s get going with The Book of Awesome:
(67) The smell of the coffee aisle in the grocery store (pg 126)
Did you know there are some people who HATE the smell of coffee?
I am not one of those people!
My sister, however, gags at the smell of coffee.
For me, it’s a pleasant reminder of one of my favourite places – Chapters – and the memories from days when we would go hang out there and take a look at all the books during my childhood.
Back then, it was just this amazing, magical place that smelled so nice and was so fun – I had no idea that it was a chain of bookstores that you could find everywhere.
To this day, I still love going to Chapters, Indigo or any other bookstores and the wonderful smell of Starbucks is a huge part of that! (It’s almost too tempting NOT to go get a Java Chip Frappucino.)
(68) That pile of assorted beers left in your fridge after a party (pg 127)
I don’t drink beers, so this doesn’t really apply to me…but assorted cakes? Now that I could get on board with.
I do remember a time when, after a big party, our freezer and fridge were FULL of assorted cakes and desserts. You’d think I’d have gotten sick of sweets then, but instead, here I am today, trying to force myself not to have sugar because I just love sugary treats way too much!
(69) Staring out at calm water (pg 129)
There’s really not much I can say about this topic that this photo I took last year can’t say better:
I am very lucky because I live within driving/commuting distance of a number of lakes. The above photo was from when I did my “30 for 30” – 30 things before my 30th birthday. I gave myself the challenge to visit a park I’d never been too, and as luck would have it, I discovered this little gem, by a lake I’d never known about – only about a 1/2 hour north of where I live! I’d drive through this area often enough for work, but had no clue this was here.
This past week, a friend and I went for another visit, and it’s just as nice as I remembered. I’d say it was slightly more enjoyable on my first visit, though, because I went in September when it was so quiet and the humidity was lower, making the water look much nicer and bluer (as seen in that above picture).
(70) Sneaking McDonald’s and hiding the evidence (pg 131)
This little exchange that Neil Pasricha wrote up between his friends Molly and Scott reminded me of an – opposite – exchange between myself and a childhood friend of mine.
We’d stopped into the McDonald’s drive-thru so she could get fries and to get my sister an ice cream. She turned to me and said, “What do you want?”
And I, at the time very healthy and diligent about my food intake, said, “Nothing, thanks. I don’t eat McDonalds anymore.”
Her: “WHAT. Wait, WHAT?”
Me: “Yeah, actually come to think of it… I don’t eat fast food at all.”
Her: “You don’t eat ANY fast food?!”
Me: “Well, I do eat Subway, but I don’t think that counts–“
Her: (at the same time as me) “Yeah, no, that doesn’t count.”
She stared at me suspiciously the entire drive back home. I should probably add, just so you get a full – hilarious picture – that this friend of mine is a beauty queen. A literal beauty queen, I’m not just using the phrase to describe her, she actually won a local, well-known beauty contest about 10 years ago. This exchange just makes me laugh even more when you take that into consideration – she was willing to have McD’s…but I wasn’t.
This was probably about four or five years ago, though, and I’ve eased up since then (as my waistband can attest to!), but I still try to limit the amount of fast food I eat.
Now, if I do go to McDonald’s, I am one of those weird people who actually eats their salads! I know, it sounds ridiculous, but their Greek salad isn’t that bad! (By now I’ve eaten it too often that I’ve gotten quite sick of it, though.)
The other thing that McDonald’s always sucks me back in with is the complete opposite of healthy – their cookies.
I was a bit miffed by their rebranding as McCafe, at first, but I soon realized what a brilliant idea it was to compete with the (aforementioned) Starbucks allure and, here in Canada, our precious Tim Hortons. I actually know more people who enjoy McDonald’s coffee and pastries than most other coffee shops around here! So kudos to them. Their cookies are, for sure, so worth the trip.
(71) Your family car growing up (pg 133)
We were just talking about our family cars from when I was a kid yesterday and how I always knew who was picking me up from school by the sound the cars made. My dad had a diesel car, and those make the MOST noise. Apparently, as I just found out yesterday, my dad was not a fan of diesel cars because of the noise, but once he got one, it’s been his favourite of all his cars since!
One of the cars Pasricha mentions in this section actually brought back memories of another big car from my childhood. Amongst his examples, he lists a Chevy Lumina van, which I never experienced, but my brother’s car when I was a kid was a Lumina that we affectionately referred to as… “The Lumina!” (We have become more creative with names since. I named my current carBuster Keaton, after my favourite silence movie actor/director.)
I don’t know that the car was as awesome as my memory makes it out to be, or if it’s just the fact that the memories I have of it are awesome. It’s probably just the haze of coolness of having a big brother who’d take me to buy toys or introduce me to new songs in his cool car.
My best friend’s family also had a Lumina, not sure why they were so popular with everyone around here in the mid-90s, but they were! When my brother’s car, sadly, finally gave up, I warned her there was a good chance the same would happen to her family’s car in time. And what do you know, a few months later, theirs also conked out for good.
Funny enough, what I most remember about The Lumina was that my brother always had McDonald’s food boxes and napkins in there… which totally falls in line with the previous topic too!
(72) Eating a free sample of something you have no intention of buying (pg 135)
I am going to announce a really unpopular opinion and I need you all to brace yourself.
Are you ready?
I…am not a fan of Costco.
I know! I know! Everyone loves Costco. Costco is God’s gift to shoppers. Costco is the greatest thing since sliced bread and it SELLS sliced bread.
Problem is, I can’t shop somewhere that doesn’t have all the products I’m looking for and Costco rarely ever has anything I need. I visited with a friend who was trying her hardest to convince me of how wonderful it is, but I went in with a list of things I needed to find (vitamins, food, clothing) and found maybe 1 of the 10 things on my list.
Due to food allergies and sensitivities, I have to be pretty particular about the things I choose (likewise with family members) and because of that, I can’t handle the inconsistency of Costco having different items in stock every week. It’s a total waste for me to go there for ONE item that I can get much cheaper, only to waste gas to go to the mall/grocery store to pick up everything else.
That being said, I learned from my dermatologist that even if you don’t have a Costco membership, you can still go to their pharmacy, which, let me tell you, was a pretty amazing discovery – a prescription medication that cost $65 at my regular pharmacy was only $12 at the Costco pharmacy.
And yet with that wonderful discovery came my further annoyance with Costco, in the fact that they told me I could pick it up in a half hour – which left me wandering the store because trying to get in and out of that parking lot was just ridiculous at that time – and when I came back… they said it wasn’t ready and would be another half hour.
I assume this was a scheme on their part, attempting to get me to buy things while waiting. But as we all know, I don’t have a membership! So, what did I do for that hour (really, hour and 15 minutes by the end of it)?
I went around and ate ALL THE FREE SAMPLES I COULD!
And thus, this entire topic just screams out – my relationship with Costco…
At this point, I am just about 1/3rd of the way through The Book of Awesome. I’m probably going to start running out of stuff to say soon enough…
(61) The first scoop out of a jar of peanut butter (pg 117)
Oh, well, I haven’t run out of things to say here!
I used to love peanut butter. It was toasty, tasty and still relatively healthy compared to other snack foods.
Around 2011, my allergies started to get weirdly out of control. I’ve always had allergies – trees, pollen, dust, some foods. Suddenly, as of this year, I was getting itchy all the time and headaches and sinus pains much too frequently. I knew I had sinus issues, sure, but this was too often. And then the worst happened…
I found out I was allergic to apples. My favourite fruit, that which everyone associated with ME, and I was allergic to it!
From there it was a steady fall of other fruits – peaches…pears…plums…pineapple…
Then other foods – shrimp, mushrooms, zucchinis, cashews, almonds, pecans and yes…peanuts.
I am very fortunate to not be anaphylactic at this stage, but it has reached the point where I can’t even have regular – non-peanut, just chocolate – M&Ms because my throat starts feeling bruised and swollen.
Allergies are thought to be cyclical, so there’s a chance I might not always have them, but I’ve been having allergy injections for about two years now and I still have had pretty severe reactions, so it’s not something I like to risk. (I can’t even go near apple trees or orchards because I start to react – I even had a reaction walking by some in our kitchen one time.)
So, with all this on my plate (or, that is to say, not on my plate) – I am relegated to eating soy nut butter. Namely – as seen to the right – WOW Butter.
And lemme tell ya, it’s okay as a substitute, the consistency is close, as is the look, so you don’t feel so left out on the peanut butter front… but it’s still not peanut butter.
I have yet to find anything aside from Wow Butter that I can actually eat and even that I shouldn’t have to often because it’s made of soy and apparently it’s easy to become sensitive to soy too…
I have tried Sunflower Seed Butter, but it’s not creamy and doesn’t taste anywhere close to the deliciousness of peanut butter.
I am very jealous of people without allergies! I would even settle for just the peanut allergy as long as I could have other nuts – almond butter and almond milk and the like seem like fine substitutes to have!
Alas, I guess those things are just not meant for me…
(62) Hearing a stranger fart in public (pg 119)
What am I supposed to say about this one??
It is pretty funny, I’ll give you that. Sometimes it’s mortifying, though, and you feel so bad for that person. Actually, you know what this makes me think of – that German word that means you feel embarrassed for someone else’s embarrassment.
That’s me. That’s how other people’s public farts make me feel.
(63) Perfectly toasted toast (pg 122)
This. This is my perfect toast.
To some of you, this is probably WAY under-toasted to be a good piece of toast and some of you will think it’s even too toasted. The point is – we all have our ideal and I can bet no two people have the exact same version of perfection.
Even when it comes to what you put on your toast – what does everyone prefer?
As you’ve seen above, I eat Wow Butter, so my current favourite of late is slathered in Wow Butter, with a bit of raw honey. On the days when I am trying not to have too much Wow Butter, some regular butter and honey, or coconut oil and honey are good too. If I could still have peanut butter, I’m sure that’d win out though!
(64) When someone unjams the photocopier for you (pg 123)
These angels, who come along and do this are a GOD-SEND! I am glad now that I have had a ton of experience with a variety of photocopiers at my various jobs, internships and volunteer opportunities over the years because at first they were just so intimidating.
The intimidation factor goes up when you consider that photocopiers in this day and age aren’t just about photos or copying, they have all this newfangled computerized technology so you can email and scan and download your entire genetic makeup and life history (okay, maybe not that…yet).
About 4 years ago, at one of my jobs, I realized something that I feel I ought to share with all of you, as a Public Service Announcement, just in case it ever happens to you:
Sometimes the “jam” isn’t a JAM at all!
It’s the computer memory thinking it’s a jam
…but there’s nothing at all in the way!
For a good half hour, my coworker and I ripped apart our photocopier, trying to find where the pesky piece of paper had gotten lodged. We literally pulled out EVERY paper – all stacks, all loose sheets. We managed to find a moderately jammed piece of paper and got it out in one piece – not a single tiny corner left behind (sometimes those are the culprit that’ll ruin the whole thing!) and yet the screen kept flashing “Paper Jam.”
She eventually gave up and went back to work, deciding she no longer had the time or patience for the infernal device, but I was determined.
I wasn’t about to let some boxy robot tell me what’s what!
After double checking all of the trays again, I started to wonder…
Wait a minute…
What if it wasn’t an issue with the photocopier itself, so much as it was the computer screen?
I scoured the photocopier for some sort of indication of the make and model, and managed to find a number I could search.
Sure enough, I found out that it was not uncommon for photocopiers, particularly of that make, to accidentally store when a jam had happened in its memory!
I found instructions to clear the memory and voila! Good as new.
This happened again recently on a different photocopier at a different work place, so it is much more common than you’d think. So the next time your photocopier is telling you it has a jam and you’re sure it doesn’t, heed my advice!
(65) Reading the nutritional label and eating it anyway (pg 124)
Sometimes, he’s right, you just have to live a little! It’s okay to take that chance every so often – so long as your personal health allows for it – but…it is a bit scary to look at something and see your ENTIRE’S DAY worth of sugar allotment.
(66) When you’re watching one of your favourite movies and you realize you don’t remember how it ends (pg 125)
I can’t see this ever happening – at least not with me. If a movie is a favourite, I will definitely remember what happens because that means I’ve watched it a billion times.
I can see it happening with a good movie that, maybe, I’ve only seen once. This actually did just happen a little while ago with my family and the Liam Neeson movie, Non-Stop.
We’d all seen it before, we’d all enjoyed it and yet, for the life of us, none of us could remember who the actual “bad guy” turned out to be.
We knew it wasn’t Liam Neeson, but it literally could have been anyone else.
And even though we’d seen it before, we were all gripped, trying to remember until the big reveal. (Just a note that my dad was right on with his guess.)
I find this is something that happens often too with shows like Law & Order, where you remember the episode is good, but you have no clue who actually did it. (That is, until they started to have a lot of famous and flashy guest starts, then it just turned into, “Oh, hey, *insert big name celebrity here* is guest-starring…They did it.” :p )
And that’s where we shall adjourn for today (that Law & Order bit and The People vs. OJ Simpson are getting too into my brain!)
It completely slipped my mind to post yesterday. The day just seemed to fly by, and next thing I knew, it was 10pm!
Before I go onwards with The Book of Awesome, part of why I was distracted was because I was catching up on American Crime Story: The People vs. OJ Simpsonmini-series on FX (they are smart to put their shows on in marathons, they’ve sucked me in twice now! First Fargo, now this!).
If you haven’t seen it already, and especially if you lived through the actual OJ Simpson trial, watch it! It’s very well made and well acted. I was young at the time of the trial (7-8 years old), but remember it very clearly – they announced the verdict over the announcements at my elementary school because everyone was so caught up in it. Seeing the inner workings (even if fictionalized), of both sides is very interesting.
Anyhow, back to the book!
(55) Getting gas just before the price goes up (pg 107)
I’m not sure what gas prices are like around the world, or even how gas is charged in others places, but here, it’s by the litre.
At last glance, gas prices around here were around $1.06/litre…which in the olden days, would have been pretty dang high, but is actually, nowadays, pretty dang low! The last time I needed gas, it was up to $1.13! (Notice I say “needed” because I am not one of those people who smartly gets gas when the price is low, but gets it when I am almost at empty and am at the mercy of the gas stations and conglomerates and their crazy – seemingly arbitrary – prices!)
It’s rare to ever catch the gas under $1 these days, but the moment when you do, just like Neil Pasricha says, it’s an exciting moment! Even more exciting is when you manage to get a perfect pump, by which I mean $25.00 instead of $25.01 (though in these days, getting $25.01 is pretty exciting too because we don’t have pennies here anymore, so you get a FREE CENT OF GAS! 😛 )
I still remember when the gas prices started to rise… I remember talking to my friend’s dad when he was driving us to an amusement park about whether or not he thought the prices would ever come down again (it was around $0.75 at the time)… Both of us agreed it wouldn’t happen any time soon. Here we are, about 12 years later, and they haven’t been anywhere close to that price since!
(56) The pushoff (pg 109)
If there’s one thing that encapsulates my first time learning how to ride a bike without training wheels, it’s the phrase “NO U-TURNS!”
My dad taught me how to ride my bike, and much like Pasricha writes in the book: “Dad’s holding you steady as you pedal, pedal, pedal” – which is exactly how it went.
Somehow, for some reason, any time my dad would let go, I would end up wheeling back around, making a “U-Turn” – I assume it must’ve been because I was nervous when I realized he let go, so I started turning back towards him instead of just going straight.
Then, my dad gave me a good pep talk and said the phrase that’s stuck with me, “No U-Turns!” One time, I heard my dad yell out “NO U-TURNS!” behind me, and guess what? I didn’t U-Turn, I just kept on going straight!
What a moment. What a memory.
(57) Wearing sandals when you shouldn’t be wearing sandals (pg 110)
I haven’t been able to find a good pair of sandals for years. Either they’re really clunky and ugly, OR they’re really adorable and flat.
Practical but hideous
Impractical but cute
Even when I worked in shoe stores (I worked in two different ones), I could never find sandals that suited me well. Ones that look perfect would rub or be itchy or have a seam that just dug into you!
I am very lucky that I had a manager who was super cool and told us – encouraged us – to try on our store’s footwear when it was slow, so we could actually get a feel for them and be able to share that with customers.
This wasn’t the best when I finally gave in to my long-time desire to try on 3-inch heels and I happened to so so right when someone came in asking for the shoes on the HIGHEST POSSIBLE SHELF!
I had to climb up the shelf – already dangerous – in 3-inch heels – definitely dangerous, which I had never attempted to wear before in my life – extremely dangerous.
Thankfully, that all went perfectly fine and taught me that:
I CAN wear 3-inch heels!
I can get stuff DONE in 3-inch heels.
I became a fan of extremely high heels at that point and never looked back! Even when people tried to “tall-shame” me (I don’t know if that’s a thing, but I am making it a thing 😛 ) by saying “Pshh, you’re already so tall, what do YOU need to wear heels for?!”
You know what for?
My fellow tall-ies out there will know, being tall takes a toll on your back! And in my case, being tall and wearing flat shoes really takes a toll on my back. This is why I have struggled with sandals. I finally found ones last year that seemed to work and then this summer… back to the back pain. 😦
So, I can’t say I relate to this at all because I don’t wear sandals in the summer, much less at any other time of year.
BUT I can relate to wearing shoes that really shouldn’t be worn at certain times at those times (as I said above).
(58) Getting off an airplane after a long flight (pg 113)
I don’t want to make this all about being tall again, but… you can imagine what plane rides are like when you have added height! Same goes for the movie theatre. I am so thankful for IMAX and VIP cinemas for their spacious leg room!
In terms of plane rides, I have found the best and worst spot all in one:
Why is it the best?
All that spacious, spacious leg room!
Why is it the worst?
Because it’s the EMERGENCY EXIT SEATS!
The flight crew works under the assumption that if you sit there you will be calm and rational enough to help people escape under duress. I did agree that I could do so and I have, since, helped kids out during a Fire Alarm and know how to handle such emergencies, but a plane emergency might be a little more anxiety-inducing.
STILL, for that sweet, sweet leg room… I will muster all my bravery to help the good people off the plane if need be!
(59) Picking a q and u at the same time in Scrabble (pg 114)
Ever since Words with Friends came along, our family has become very adept at Scrabble-esque games.
No, wait, it actually started way before that. With this amazing incarnation of the game, Yahoo’s Literati!
We used to play this so often and then segued into Words with Friends once apps started to take over. To give you an idea of how often we play, I currently have 8 games going (which is actually less than some days!)
With all these games, I’ve learned you don’t necessairly need a U to make the most of a Q. Neil Pasricha mentions one of the U-less Q words: qat, BUT you can also make qats, qi or qis. A search just now told me that there are actually WAY MORE words than that, but those four are my standard ones; the ones that helped me realize a Q isn’t as hopeless a letter as I’ve previously assumed.
You know which letters are hopeless?
C and V.
When you’re down to your last few letters and you know all you can make are two-letter words, squished into a crevice – a C and a V are the LAST things you want (which makes my phrasing here pretty ironic because “crevice“ has both…)
Can you think of a single 2-letter word that starts or ends with a C or a V?
And now that you’ve been provided this knowledge, go out into the word and make good use of those TL and TW tiles, to get yourself 30+ points!
(60) Old folks who sit on their porch and wave at your when you walk by (pg 116)
I am sad to report that my area doesn’t have a ton of porches… or old folks, for that matter. I am happy to say, that thanks to one of my jobs, I get to chat with old folks often enough and it’s actually one of the best parts of my day!
I give tours at a museum and find the older people always have the best anecdotes, the best stories and are just full of conversation, unlike a lot of younger people who are just quick to grab their phones for pictures.
Some of my best tours have been ones where I learned more from visitors than they have from me!
A lot of older visitors are just happy to share their memories and connections to our site and artefacts, which I am glad to partake of – I have actually picked up on a few things that I’ve then incorporated into tours with other people (i.e. I learned what a manure wagon is and I met descendants of the people who used to own some of our artefacts).
Also, the older I’m getting, the more crotchety I’m becoming. I find I actually relate much better to the 80-year-olds with my “Kids these days…” and “This newfangled place, full of construction, isn’t how I remember it…” comments, than I do to the trendy twenty-somethings. (Then again, I was a crotchety teenager too, so I suppose it’s nothing new, and has just grown from there!)
Have yourselves a good rest of your Monday (or . Until next time!
(49) The thank-you wave when you let somebody merge in front of you (pg 96)
I just experienced one of these right before I sat down to write this and realized, do you know how rare I find the “thank-you wave” is these days?
Mr Pasricha sets out four types of courtesy-waves on top of just your good ol’ Thank-You wave (the one you give when you switch lanes to thank the person who lets you in):
The Red Light Squeeze – when you need to make a right turn and the person ahead of you goes up a bit so you can squeeze by and make your turn earlier than you would have otherwise.
The Pre-Wave – when you are already squeezing your way into an already packed lane and are giving them a wave so they’ll let you in and “build up some goodwill.”
The Apology Wave – when you do something like block up traffic trying to get out of your parking spot (though the example he gives is the much more aggressive, “side-swip[ing] a van of teenagers.” :p
The Go-Ahead Wave – when you let someone go ahead of you at a four-way stop.
I’d say I manage to do all of them at some point – but probably #2 the least because I am not a very aggressive driver and rarely try to squeeze into tight places. I do give it if I need to switch lanes because of construction blocking part of the road, that I just noticed as I got closer to it, and someone is nice enough to let me in (which…really…they’re supposed to do anyway and I usually don’t have this happen because I’ll spot the sign well in advance and switch ASAP), but that seems more like an Apology Wave.
How many of these have I found people give me? In recent years? Practically NONE!
I don’t know if it’s just my area (could be) or that people are too busy to even give a little wave these days (might be), but getting the wave I did today (it was a #3 – apology wave because I had to wait to pass by because she had been pulling out of a parking spot awkwardly) I was actually surprised to get a thank-you wave.
This leads me to think, there’s actually a FIFTH thank-you/courtesy wave that I just gave to that lady today myself:
5. The OMG you actually gave me a thank-you wave, I feel I need to thank-you wave back at you just for that! Wave
Then again, I am Canadian, so this might be just one of our over-the-top politeness moments too…
(50) When you’re really tired and about to fall asleep and someone throws a blanket on you (pg 98)
As nice as this is in theory, I am one of those people who, if I do happen to start napping (which, as you may have learned from Day 2, I don’t tend to), the slightest change in the environment will wake me up.
Gets a bit warmer? I’ll wake up.
Someone shuts the TV off? I’ll wake up.
Someone throws a blanket on me? I’ll wake up.
And to be honest, I don’t mind because when I fall asleep in the middle of the family room… I’m usually drooling all over myself, so better to stop me earlier!
(51) Getting your ID checked when you’re way over the legal age (pg 100 – woo hoo!)
I was never a rebellious child or teen. I never had any need for a fake ID because I never did anything that would require one.
I probably could’ve gotten away with way more than the average kid too because I was a head taller than almost everyone I knew. When I was in grade 3 (8 or 9 years old for those of you not in the Canadian school system), someone asked me if I knew a boy in Grade 8 – so that tells you how tall I actually was (still am, but I think it was more confusing to people when I was younger.)
Now, thanks to the good genes of my awesome parents, even though I have been alive for a full (*shudder*) THREE DECADES I still get asked for ID. Just to let you know how young people think I am, you may remember from my birthday post that I was excited to turn 19 years old because I was legally able to gamble – that’s the same age you need to be to drink and buy cigarettes too (not that I want to).
At the ripe o’ age of 30 (31 in six weeks!), I still get asked for ID when buying lottery tickets! In fact, a week after my 30th birthday, a cashier asked me for ID when I bought a scratch ticket. I burst out laughing and said, “I’m 30!” (First time I actually said those words out loud too), but produced my licence anyway for inspection, all while he was saying “No, no! It’s okay! It’s okay! I believe you!”
You’d think I hate that, but boy do I love it. I was more than happy to show off my licence to him.
You know what I do hate? When people say, “You look just like you did in high school.” WELL, what kind of backhanded compliment is that?? I like to think I look better than I did in high school, thank you very much! But, as my sister pointed out when I ranted about this very thing to her, “There’s a huge difference between someone saying you look 16 and you look like your 16 year old self.” Not many people I know want to look like their 16 year old SELF again!
(52) The smell of rain on a hot sidewalk (pg 103)
We’ve had a severely rainy summer this year, unlike one we’ve had since my childhood. Usually, in the last few years, we’d get spurts of five minutes of rain and then it would end and be back to blistering heat.
This year, we’ve had some proper thunderstorms, kinds that, actually, do remind me of being a kid and jumping around in the rain. The smell of rain on a hot sidewalk (or driveway, even more for me) totally reminds me of childhood because of this very reason. I used to love when I’d go out just after it rained and I’d see the rain already starting to evaporate away into hot mist. At the time, I didn’t quite understand what was happening, it just seems to like some cool sort of magic.
(53) That friendly nod between strangers out doing the same thing (pg 104)
I am really trying to wrack my brain to remember a time when I had this happen…
If anything, I don’t think I’ve ever have gotten a nod, so much as an awkward smile OR strangers who just randomly start up conversations.
This never happened more than when I started reading the Harry Potter books in 2005.
I was in university at the time (late to the party, mostly due to my own stubbornness of not wanting to give in when my friends tried to convince me they were amazing – that’s a whole other story that could warrant a post all its own), and I found myself reading them all over campus.
With every single book, I would get at least ONE weirdo person who would yell to me:
“OH MY GOD! THAT’S THE BEST ONE!”
When I finished all six books (at the time), I soon realized… I was that person weirdo.
Whenever I saw someone reading one of the Harry Potter’s I would get all excited inside and want to talk to them, and I do believe one time, when someone was reading Goblet of Fire, I did the exactly thing people had done to me and yelled out:
“OH MY GOD! THAT IS THE BEST ONE!”
(Since then, I’ve come to think of Half-Blood Prince as my favourite, but Goblet of Fire is still my other favourite…though Deathly Hallows is up there too!)
Maybe it’s just because I am a chatty person, so rather than a nod, people are more likely get an awkward conversation instead…
(54) Really, really old Tupperware (pg 105)
Ahh there’s only one thing this calls to mind.
The pink container.
Since I was young, we have had these pink Tupperware containers that we have constantly used for everything.
In this day and age of BPA and all that freaky stuff, it’s probably not the best thing to still be using… But we’re just all so used to them. Not a day goes by where at least one of us doesn’t use the “pink containers” for something! (That sentence came out weird; a lot of double negatives… What I mean to say, is that we always use the dang things!)
And that is where I must leave you all today. Try to contain your disappointment! 😛